Parenting 101 or NOT!

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There are many things that we learn through age and experience.  As they say, hind sight is 20/20, but it has been through my role of Nana/grandparent that my eyes have been opened the widest and the mental light bulb has flashed with numerous “Aha” moments.  I became a mother at the age of 20 and again at 21.  I mothered on the continuum of believing, if children are wet…change them…hungry…feed them…cold…clothe them and in between sing and rock and love them.  So that is how my two daughters survived childhood.  I didn’t have magazines, books, television or radio shows telling me that I would warp my child if I didn’t prescribe to a certain method of child rearing.  I talked to my children but did not debate with my two year old on the issue of “why it was not safe to run into the road.”  If “NO and STOP!” did not work, a swat to the behind did stop them in their tracks.  Today, many would see that as cruel and demeaning to a child and yet the average two year old does not comprehend the concept that the big semi that is approaching will flatten them like a pancake.  So life went on and I parented on what I thought was a common sense approach.  Talk to them, answer their questions, know who their friends are and set the rules.  I didn’t live in a fantasy world believing that my rules would never be broken, because they were, but I didn’t believe that parenting was an activity that required charts, methods and debate.  If what I was doing didn’t work, then I tried something else.

As the years went by and my girls became mothers themselves, I became a Nana and that was glorious, and yet nothing really changed about how I dealt with my grandchildren except that as with most grandparents, grandchildren always seem to be elevated to a level that is a notch above your own.  It was at this point that I saw how bombarded with “parenting” this generation had become.  Books, blogs, programs, seminars, classes, meetings and the list goes on and on.  Yes, there is value in many of these things, but what I find the scariest is the fact that many parents are robbed of using their own common sense to figure out what is best for their child without dealing with the scorn and judgement of others who prescribe to a certain “parenting” philosophy.  For every book that says method A is the way to go, there is another that claims that method B is the one recommended by the “experts.”  The problem with all of these experts, studies and rigorous methods is that the child is often caught in the middle of whatever method is being prescribed and drowns in a sea of parenting information.

Perhaps it is time that we put common sense, love, attention and guidance front and center with each child that comes into our lives.  A child is just a smaller version of what we once were and our needs are all pretty much the same.  We all want to know that we are loved, we all want our physical needs met and we all want someone to hear what we have to say.  I firmly believe if we parent, grandparent, teach and support with these things front and center…the rest will fall into place and the books, classes, and sea of information will find it’s proper and useful place.

Sockisms

​The beauty of a sockism is it is simple like a sock monkey, anyone can understand it and choose to embrace it or not.  If you choose to embrace a sockism, you are on your way to making your spot on this earth a little bit kinder.   You put on a sockism just as you would your socks…one at a time!

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Arrogance x ignorance are two negatives that will never produce a positive!

Love is the four letter word that cancels out the rest!

Failure is just one component in the blueprint of success!

Only look down in order to lift someone up

​My personal freedoms should never create your  personal prison

      Rage in our words can be as deadly as the rage in our fists

Time is priceless, spend it wisely

Stand tall so you can see beyond despair

Never demand the last word…it may be how you are remembered

   

Learning to be content makes our “wants” small and our

blessings abundant

                                  

    A serving of gratitude improves your attitude

                           Chase your dreams not your tail

​             Write your life’s story in pencil so you can make your corrections as needed           

​                               Don’t be a stranger to those who care about you

              Failure to mentally yield and look both ways in life can lead to disaster

​                       Watch a child play and learn the importance of dreams                 

                 Believe, achieve, repeat!

Be a lifeline not a roadblock to another persons dream

What’s our excuse?

Good Morning, This morning I was thinking about when my girls were little and they were being taught manners. I remember gently nudging them when someone gave them a gift and they forgot to say “thank you.” I would ask, (what do you say?) and then the forgotten thank you would appear. Anyone with children/grandchildren remembers the please and thank you lessons and the other manners that we have tried to instill. “Don’t interrupt when someone is speaking, say “excuse me” we don’t call people fat or say they have a big nose because that could hurt their feelings and is mean.” And after all of our hard work we rejoice when someone comments on what a polite child little Jimmy or Suzy is. So, My question is this…what’s our excuse for lack of manners at the grocery store when the cashier is having trouble scanning an item or we are the 10th in line at Starbucks and we don’t think the poor gal is mass producing the ” skinny grande mocha with sugar free, steamed extra warm and hold the whipped cream” fast enough? We can teach and preach manners until the “cow jumps over the moon” but if we don’t walk our talk, children will soon catch on, that as soon as they are old enough they can be as nasty as they like….it is one of the benefits of being an adult. Just my thoughts, think about it, please ! Kindness produces kindness no matter how old we are!  Please visit http://www.sockmonkeynation.com to learn more about kindness and help stop the bullying~