MANAGING STRESS…..We all have enough of our own garbage without dealing with other people’s crap too! Learn how to incorporate a little common sense into your relationship with others, the importance of creating healthy boundaries and the difference the correct perspective makes. Learn why saying NO…is often the kindest thing you can do for another person who is buried in their self created drama. Using a little common sense isn’t rocket science, so don’t dismiss it as if it were ~ If you’re serious about eliminating the undo stress in your life…give this little book a chance to help you dump your emotional trash~Cindi Walton~
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I was born in May of 1957 and never realized at the time that I’d become the first of four children in the Walton family. A brother followed my arrival less than a year later and a sister two years after that, and then….Nothing, no more kids, nada, until 1966, nine years after I was born…my parent’s adopted my baby sister Robin. I was in hog heaven because at the age of nine, she was my personal doll. One that ate, peed and cried without the need of batteries…and so the Walton family was complete and life went on. Fast forward and I am now seventeen and my parent’s are leaving me in charge of the other siblings while they are gone for a short two day trip. Logic tells you that the sixteen year old brother wasn’t taking orders from me, so I gave none. The fourteen year sister still thought I was kinda cool, so she gave me no trouble and darling Robin was still a sweetie in my eyes…that is until it happened…she emotionally flipped the table on me and she was in charge. Let me set the stage. I was requesting a few simple things from her, get dressed, pick up your toys and brush your teeth. She gave me a little static, not much and did as I asked. It was later on that she came to me and said, “Cindi, you know I’m special!” I remember getting down to her level and thought I was doing my best surrogate parent/big sister thing by replying, “Yes you are very special!” At this point she was supposed to smile and go away…instead she once again says, “Cindi, I am really special cause mom and dad picked me out and you just happened…SO you’re not the boss of me!” WOW…she had pushed my buttons and told me a thing or two. As she defiantly walked away, it hit me…Damn, she’s right. I remember thinking, “If I could find the receipt for her, I’d take her back”…just kidding, but the truth of the matter is this, I was a honeymoon baby, my brother Michael was a oops and my sister Tina was a ditto oops…But Robin Ann Walton had been planned, anticipated and sought out…she was indeed the chosen one! Fast forward, I am now approaching sixty, Robin has surpassed me in height, so SHE LOOKS DOWN at me, yet she is still my baby sister and I will never forget the day she put her big sister in her place! Gotta love her…she’s the Chosen One!
A few years back, my granddaughter asked my mother about the wrinkles on her face, to which mom replied, “My wrinkles are love lines that I have gotten with each child, grandchild and now with you Kaleigh, my great grand child.” You could see the wheels turning inside my grand-daughter’s head as she gently stroked my mother’s face. With the seriousness of a college professor, Kaleigh proclaimed, “Old Nana, you must be really, really loved with that many wrinkles.” I thought my mother would wet her pants as she roared with laughter. Mom is now seventy eight and Kaleigh is almost eleven. Each time we relive this story I am reminded that children do not see our wrinkles, gray hair or sore bones as negatives, but rather they see us as vessels that love and cherish them. As I approach sixty and the wrinkles have found their way to the outer corners of my mouth and around my eyes, I have had to make personal adjustments with my attitude towards the face I see in the mirror everyday. The changes in my face reflect the changes in my life. Aging is the next step on my earthly journey. Why waste the precious time I have on this earth, looking over my shoulder and whining about the loss of my youth? To do so wastes the time I have before me. There is emotional freedom to be had when we embrace the natural order of things. I had my season of firm and baby like skin, and now it’s the season of defined laugh lines and wisps of graying hair. I am so much more than I was twenty years ago, not less, but more. More in touch with the important things in life, more apt to venture out of my comfort zone, more inclined to laugh, less likely to anger, and more in love with life than at any other time… my face and love lines reflect that. So, as I reach for the Oil of Olay and gently lather up my love lines, I can honestly say. “I have really, really been loved.”
Since my granddaughter Kaleigh would be out of state and with her father over Christmas I broke a cardinal rule and found myself getting out the decorations before Thanksgiving. As we hauled out the plastic tubs and opened them I found that I had not packed them as organized as I had done in previous years. Nativity sets were in separate bins, angels and toy soldiers were nestled among the glittered pine cones and the Christmas bear family had just spent the last 10 months separated. As I looked at the chaos and the fact that I was three weeks ahead of any “HoHoHo” feelings, it was then that I heard, “Oh Look Nana!” On the bottom of the bin was the tiniest of my nativity scenes and it was covered in the glitter and the loose sparkles of the ornaments that it had been stored with. As I lifted it out and looked at it I was amazed at how perfectly it sparkled, just as if it had come off the assembly line and was packaged that way. It was not gaudy or cheap looking but rather surreal and majestic. Kaleigh was in awe and immediately scurried looking for the perfect place to set this masterpiece. Then it hit me, Christmas is not a season to follow Thanksgiving and to be gone with the ringing in of the New Year but rather a perpetual ongoing state of love and good will. The cardinal rule that I had broken was not the one about putting up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving. The rule that I had broken was the simple fact that I had packed up the “Season of good will” and put it in a bin to be stored in the first place. A simple “Look Nana” was all it took for me to see what I should have already known. Christmas is ongoing; the spirit of the season should shine 365 DAYS OUT OF THE YEAR!
As my mind Wandered to Christmas and the gift of our salvation I was also drawn to “Peace on earth, good will towards men.” We sing this at Christmas yet God commands this of us daily. Matthew 5:9 says “Blessed are peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.” Note that this does not say we are to pursue peace just during the Christmas Holidays, but instead we are to seek and make peace continually. It is my hope and prayer that you seek to glitter with peace and love daily and not tuck those attribute away to retrieved but once a year!
Cindi Walton 2013